Y'all are gonna hate me for this but it's been pissing me off to the point I can't think straight. Puh, more than usual, anyway.
*Inhales*...
...I get it. AI images, or "art" as some people call them, are a menace. They're not good at all, not for artists overall. Not even the environment, if what I've read is true. Which, wow, that's got nothing to do with me; I didn't fucking make the damn things, not my fault if I use social media.
But for little selfish creatives, ones like me who just fucking need a little fucking bone, AI-generated images are a priceless tool.
Look at this...
This is the evolution of my cover for my first completed novel, Inhuman, from 2017 to 2024.
...As you can see, it's...not good. Not good at all. Before this, I had never made a cover before. I'd done titles and logos for a good decade before but the theme and feel for the HUSHS series and Inhuman was just...so hard to figure out even for a logo.
For the longest time, the second to last cover was the "final" cover for this story. I had completely given up trying to find something or make something using free graphics or even some non-free graphics and stock pictures and vectors, you name it.
Then in 2020, I finally succumbed to using AI, first through Artbreeder before settling nicely with Bing AI.
Seeing my characters for the first time, seeing them given faces...I could have cried. I first made a cover for Inhuman, as it is my most recognizable webnovel, and...I'm speechless. This fucking cover is exactly what I'd wanted for it. With that final image for the cover came the brand fucking-new amazing title that I made for it. It's so different from everything else. I love it. It came together so...naturally. Because I had been given a tool to unlock whatever bit of genuine creativity exists in my fucking noggin.
But.
Do you fucking think I can afford to get the artists I want to make a highly detailed cover that of course wouldn't look like that, but what the fuck man? You think I can afford anything past $50 let alone for 30+ goddamn stories?!
I want and refuse to get anything other than high-quality images for my work, even if it's just a fucking stupid webnovel no one reads. Covers are no different. If I had money, I'd pay these amazing, envy-worthy artists a hundred times over just to see my characters and worlds in their goddamn amazing art styles.
Alas.
I'm poor. Really fucking poor. I'm mentally fucked up to the point that I can't make money through writing commissions as people have legitimately asked me to do in the past. I have a very real inability to do fuck shit.
If you are a good artist...I'm not saying people aren't assholes and try to wring you for nothin'. But I cannot imagine having a creative skill with which I can actually make money. Something honed with blood and sweat and tears that you can use to not only make something amazing with, something people always choose over writing when trying to get an audience, but also something you can make money with.
Can't imagine that...that luxury.
I made an update all over some of my socials informing that I have to start selling my body to make ends meet now. That's where I am.
Goddammit...I digress.
Bing AI and Artbreeder are free. I'll bet there are other AI programs that are free, but Bing AI is just...*chef's kiss* for me. I don't need anything else. I'm satisfied.
Fuck, I am so disheartened and mad right now.
I'm not saying people aren't misusing AI images, for fuck's sake. I don't even need to elaborate on that tomfoolery.
But people like me?
Why can't we use it, even if just for now—not forever?
I cannot begin to explain how much...better...I did (in the past) after I started using AI to visualize my characters, locations, and more.
'Course, I'm a fucking bobblehead now. Can't even think straight, I have such debilitating mental fuckshit going on...
Whatever.
You get it.
No, I won't stop being pro-AI images in certain circumstances. Not now. Not if it helps even a goddamn little for my already botched, pathetic attempts at creativity. It isn't the end-all-be-all forever thing.
I don't fucking WANT to use AI images.
So, guess what? Are you happy now, antis? I put all of the four years worth of AI images I had into a neat little folder on my PC and said "sayonara", 'cause I won't use Bing AI for anything public anymore.
S'not like y'all give a fuck about what I write for me to even attempt giving the stories good covers anyway.
But, hey.
What do I know.
I'm just...a sad, fucked up transman.
Whatever.
Thanks for coming to my sad, fucked up TED Talk.
Now go on, do that thing you want to do so badly and block my fatass for defending AI. We're all fuckers here.
